The absolute worst thing about trying to get pregnant is waiting for it to happen. Having spent so many years trying to prevent it, we all assume that it will happen fairly quickly. It is a horrible shock when it doesn’t, and trying to keep yourself sane in the meantime can be tricky.
Our bodies have a rather cruel ability to also fool us into thinking we are pregnant too. Periods start being mysteriously a couple of days late, there is the odd symptom here and there. Many of us also feel just ‘different’ and sure that this must be the month. It makes it all the more gutting when it isn’t, and it is only natural to feel varying levels of disappointment and even darkness.
The fact is, in our society we are more stressed and we are also used to getting stuff whenever we decide to have it. Remember it is completely normal to take a year to get pregnant and for many people it takes even longer. Many people find it useful to set themselves goals. For example, for the first six months I know that it may well happen, and I hope it will but in the meantime I will carry on as normal and remember that there is only around a 20% chance every cycle but eventually the odds have to go in my favour. If it hasn’t happened after six months I might try ovulation kits or maybe work on my lifestyle, de-stress, eat well etc. If nothing has happened in a year then I know I can go to the GP and have some tests to check myself out. If you don’t live in the Dorset area and can’t come to see us at Catching Rainbows then check out your local acupuncturist / reflexologist /healer. Having a place you go to spend time on the balance and well being of you and your body will without a doubt help you feel more calm. You will be having dedicated time to you and your fertility and the chance to have a good chat to someone. Trust me it really helps when you are taking back some control over the situation. If you have been trying to get pregnant for a lot longer and undergoing tests and /or treatments then you definitely need some support. Try different therapists with different skills in helping you find perspective and enjoy the aspects of your life you have already achieved in. This is particularly pertinent for couples who already have children but would like more. Never forget what you already have and what you have already created in your life. For all of us this is just a tough hurdle you will find a way over, make sure you plan nice things to do and at least tell a couple of friends so you have a shoulder to cry on if you need one.
Also I am a great believer in babies being born when they are ready. There is often a lot for us to learn just by going through the process of trying to get pregnant, not just once we are parents. Perhaps some of this is already mapped out in the stars, who knows but in my experience many of my clients have undergone a change before finally conceiving. Accepting themselves, healing or learning, there has usually been a shift and that seems to be thing that allows things to flow once more. The message – basically spend time on you and shine as brightly as you can.