When your fertility expert makes you feel worse
I feel like I just SO want to come out and say my piece on this subject. Many of our clients will have created their own beautiful group of people to support them either with their fertility treatment or their natural conception.
It could be a naturopath, herbalist, acupuncturist, counsellor, and you can even count the medical specialists in this list.
They have all been invited by you to take part in this intense journey.
In my opinion (and I know Cath backs me all the way with this) it does not matter who someone is, they have the power to say something groundbreaking and helpful, as well as something hard hitting and deeply upsetting or damn right offensive.
They have the power. They don’t the right. And just because they are supposed to be an expert doesn’t always make them RIGHT about YOU.
We hear a lot about other practitioners being very sure about their theory and being pretty forceful in their opinion delivery. They may have ideal rules about what you do and don’t do, and they may have strong suggestions over what you may have ‘done wrong’.
Please my lovely ones just always know:
If something feels upsetting, overwhelming or disheartening then it is not ok, and the information that you are hearing is not the truth that your gut knows.
Yes we can all receive difficult news but it need not make you feel vulnerable, and crumbled. Delivered in the right way, any news, if it is leading you on the best path can feel safe and the ‘right’ thing to hear.
I have had to tell people some pretty difficult things but I can hand on heart say those women have never left feeling disheartened and ruined or even bullied or overwhelmed. They have felt that sense of it being what they needed to know or hear, and that they were held whilst they were processing it and given support to work out the next best steps.
If something in you rejects what someone is saying then it is ok to not follow through with their suggestion however much you might feel they are an expert.
This is your body, your timeline and your path.
Even when you do the really hard stuff it doesn’t have to feel like it will break you.
So the point is this:
If you dread going to see someone, know they will bully you or feel like their regime is impossible for you to stick to it IS ok to dump them. It IS ok to take a break and it IS ok to say it just isn’t achievable.
The right way actually doesn’t have to be the hardest way.
Women still get pregnant if they have dumped their acupuncturist. Women still get pregnant if they were told by their consultant it would be a medical impossibility. Women still get pregnant if they haven’t eating a metric fuck ton of kale for the last 6 years.
There is only one right way, and it’s the one that is right for YOU (which incidentally CAN include acupuncture and kale!!!!). Just remember this:
If someone has said something that has made you feel utterly crap, that is your whole being giving you that feeling as a signal. A warning to say, this that I am hearing is not right for me. I don’t need or want this, or this is not the truth for me (even if the evidence suggests that it is).
That’s it. That’s all x x x